---
title: Stop Selling and Start Closing With Dan Lappin
description: Dan Lappin explains how to grow your sales by detaching from the outcome and seeking to serve your prospects who are ready for change.
image: https://thesaleswhisperer.com/hubfs/Sales%20Books/Stop-Selling-and-Start-Leading.jpg
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Jun 16, 2020
# Stop Selling and Start Closing With Dan Lappin
 [Wes Schaeffer](https://thesaleswhisperer.com/blog/author/wes-schaeffer)
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## Detach from the outcome to grow your sales
**.**
---
---
***[\[ LISTEN NOW ON APPLE PODCASTS \]](https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-sales-whisperer-wes-schaeffer-hosts-the-sales-podcast/id655310847?mt=2)***
## [Sales Tips](https://thesaleswhisperer.com/best-crms) you'll learn today on [The Sales Podcast](https://www.thesaleswhisperer.com/podcast)...
- There is a lot of psychology that goes into selling
- Breaking Sales is to help someone become objective
- A lot of salespeople grind and hustle and struggle
- They become attached to the outcome
- "I hope they like me. I hope I get the business. I hope I get invited back."
- Professional athletes know to let go of the outcome
- Golfers need to focus on the execution of the swing not the fact they just double-bogeyed the last hole
- When you focus on the outcome you change the execution of the skill, and that creates too much struggle
[](https://thesaleswhisperer.com/hs/cta/wi/redirect?encryptedPayload=AVxigLJ46p%2FgP76e7oWKtLYU7bOgx3U48WO4407ZGWYn5yWVR50OIOIvriBMn4MxTcLa4z%2BlTz3zHz5%2B%2BQ93IRQilHaXCmwX%2BeyAcyLAwRG1fPTDjuCglITqx%2FZRCsALtaLf737qS57oGeRAYJV4Y3XlboodhMiTOTDdJopr9UMiAkrWBOKnUvcWrf0kat9r5J%2FUC66WLeu8c%2FqL&webInteractiveContentId=178194433547&portalId=443614)
- Bring out peak performance
- Sleep, eat right, be sharp, exercise, meditate
- These are the new routines of top performers
- Adults learn well but we're attached to our history and efforts and past results so it's hard to change our habits and actions
- The key to a good sales conversation is your mindset
- It's not just who is asking the questions or giving more information
> The new routines of top performers include sleeping, eating, exercising, and even meditating."
- We're all guarded at first
- Will this conversation help us or harm us?
- Most salespeople want and need something from the prospect
- Have a helping/serving mindset
- You need to have a detached mindset
- There are no good or bad answers
- Don't assign values to answers. Just accept them for what they are.
- How many of your prospects have decided to make a change before you ever show up? Most salespeople admit only 10-30% are at that stage.
- For those ready to make a change you can follow "old school" sales tactics.
- To get exponential growth you need to get better at addressing the other 70-80%.
- How many of those are even ready and/or need to change?
- It's human nature to overestimate and underestimate
- You have to "spar" to gain more confidence. This is done in the deal dissection.
- Hesitancy, anxiety, disappointment, frustration, etc. can show up and blow up your meeting
- Detach so you're not thrown off by "bad" answers
- Those answers "don't mean anything, yet."
- Turn into those "bad" answers
- Role play with your teammates first (AI can help with your roleplaying)
- This is a lifetime project because sales is a profession
- Do a sales detox before you get on the phone
- Your prospects become defensive when they detect sales patterns
- Ask a lazy question, get a lazy answer
- Have an advisor mindset, detach, ask meaningful questions
- Can you help? How can you help? Are they ready for help?
## Links Mentioned In [The Sales Podcast](https://www.thesaleswhisperer.com/podcast)
- Visit [Dan Lappin's site](https://www.lappin180.com)
- Listen to the [Breaking Sales Podcast](https://www.lappin180.com/breaking-sales-podcast)
[The Sales Podcast](https://thesaleswhisperer.com/blog/topic/the-sales-podcast)
## Related posts
[](https://thesaleswhisperer.com/blog/jeff-sexton)
[The Sales Podcast](https://thesaleswhisperer.com/blog/topic/the-sales-podcast)
## [Sharecroppers, Stepchildren, Ugly Ducks, and Jeff Sexton](https://thesaleswhisperer.com/blog/jeff-sexton)
 [Wes Schaeffer](https://thesaleswhisperer.com/blog/author/wes-schaeffer)
Jun 06, 2020
How to reach people that don't want to be sold .
[Read more](https://thesaleswhisperer.com/blog/jeff-sexton)
[](https://thesaleswhisperer.com/blog/old-is-new-sales-training-programs)
[custom AI solution development](https://thesaleswhisperer.com/blog/topic/custom-ai-solution-development), [Sales Training](https://thesaleswhisperer.com/blog/topic/sales-training), [ROI of AI](https://thesaleswhisperer.com/blog/topic/roi-of-ai)
## [Your Old Sales Style Is Killing Your New Business](https://thesaleswhisperer.com/blog/old-is-new-sales-training-programs)
 [Wes Schaeffer](https://thesaleswhisperer.com/blog/author/wes-schaeffer)
Jun 13, 2025
New Sales Training Programs Are Needed As Times Change.
[Read more](https://thesaleswhisperer.com/blog/old-is-new-sales-training-programs)
[](https://thesaleswhisperer.com/blog/stephen-somers)
[The Sales Podcast](https://thesaleswhisperer.com/blog/topic/the-sales-podcast)
## [Become an Amazon Superhero With Stephen Somers](https://thesaleswhisperer.com/blog/stephen-somers)
 [Wes Schaeffer](https://thesaleswhisperer.com/blog/author/wes-schaeffer)
Oct 31, 2022
Collect business models and make money as an affiliate \[ LISTEN NOW ON APPLE PODCASTS \]
[Read more](https://thesaleswhisperer.com/blog/stephen-somers)
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